we’ll live happily ever after.” Um, not so fast, one Marriage Master wife said with a certain look that meant business.
“Whoever said being soul mates was going to be easy?
Matthew Boggs, whose parents divorced, was jaded about marriage. ” Entering matrimony with the mindset that “divorce is not an option” is vital for the long-term success of marriage, say the Marriage Masters (a term we gave couples who have been happily married over 40 years).
To find out what was the secret to a long and happy marriage, Boggs and his friend, Jason Miller, traveled 12,000 miles around the U. to talk to what they call the “Marriage Masters,” couples who have been married 40 years or more. Marriage Masters simplify this into one word: deal breakers that very few of our interviewed couples advocated working through.
In their new book, “Project Everlasting,” Boggs and Miller share advice from the happy couples. These are known as the three A’s — addiction, adultery, and abuse.
“And that’s the beauty of marriage,” said Maurice, another Marriage Master.
“All of our individualities, all of our wonderful differences. You can’t get any heat without friction.” We would do well, they say, to expect non-perfection; practice patience and give the acceptance we want in return.
” Her husband of 52 years nodded, then added, “Marriage is a bed of roses, thorns and all.” Any time two individuals live together (especially over 40 years) there are bound to be annoying, irritating, and frustrating experiences.But whether it’s the toothpaste cap, toilet seat, snoring, or the last-minute pull-the-car-over-to-check-the-score-of-the-game-at-the-local-bar move, one thing is for sure: the best marriages are served with an extra helping of acceptance for one another’s peccadilloes.