Coping with dating rejection

’ Rejection like breaking up, is never going to be easy to do, but it’s safe to say that when you have higher self-esteem and love yourself unconditionally, rejection has far less of an impact on you.Whilst it seems all too easy to declare that you love these men unconditionally and without boundaries, it seems to be much harder to give yourself any love.This means that even though you will navigate bumps along the relationship road, your love of yourself remains intact and your value doesn’t plummet with every relationship.So a Mr Unavailable who is unable to connect with emotions healthily anyway, that you have a relationship with that doesn’t work out, becomes you thinking that it must be something about you why he couldn’t engage better because you think you gave him so much love and care that he should have been able to emotionally engage, so there must be something wrong with you.Women who love emotionally unavailable men and ‘assclowns’ find it so easy to assume that there is something wrong with them when their relationships don’t work, because in choosing men that reflect the negative things that they believe about themselves, being ‘rejected’ by these clowns feels like some sort of confirmation that there is something wrong with them.A bit like ‘If he can’t see what a great woman I am, there must be something really wrong with me!


One of the most difficult things for someone who has been involved with a Mr Unavailable or assclown is the lingering feeling of rejection, something that most people experience in relationships.Here is the problem: In choosing men that reflect the things you truly believe about yourself, you find yourself with a Mr Unavailable or assclown who by their very nature are incapable of giving you the relationship that you profess to want.This not only sets them up for a test that they’re bound to fail, but it also sets you up for failure.Each time this happens, it sends a message to you, that what you secretly (or even openly) believe about yourself, love, and relationships is true.

I think on some level, many of you recognise that these guys are not worthy of your time, and the confusion and rejection kicks in, because you can’t understand why someone who is unworthy of your time would reject someone like you, because you know you’re better than a guy like him…yet you’re not interested in a guy who would actually treat you better….

Your ability to cope with and process rejection is tied to your self-esteem because how rejected you feel and the effect it has on your perception of you, is intrinsically tied into your ability to love yourself.


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