Dating an older teen boy

One son was dating a girl for a short time who said that for Christmas she didn’t want a present. Yes, that means what you think it can not possibly mean. In talking with my friends who are also mothers of teenage boys, this is not uncommon.

After I recovered from my shock and fantasies of driving over to her house and breaking both of her legs in the hopes that she’d be encased in a full body cast and therefore desiring a more appropriate present, my son revealed that he just wasn’t interested in doing that with her. Every single one of them has stories of girls being the pushy and demanding ones, not just in a sexual way, but in a controlling, bordering on stalking way. My son called her when we got home and “broke up” with her.

One mother told me of the explicit text messages her son was receiving from a girl at all hours of the night. He basically told her that she was not nice and he didn’t really like her anymore. I have been closely monitoring to see if Glenn continues her controlling and mean ways.

Admittedly I am not friends with anyone who has teenage girls, for all I know they see boys behaving in the exact same manner. I would not tolerate my own children talking to me in such a disrespectful manner and I certainly would not take it from one of their friends. Then I ignored the next 8 calls from her as we drove the 2 miles home. So far my son says she isn’t bothering him and the phone records support this.

When my kids were younger and the subject of them dating would come up I would say that I wasn’t going to allow dating until they were married. My only experiences thus far in the teenage world of dating has been as the mother of boys. Either that or her brothers will scare off any boy that dares to come near her. They are the ones pressuring the girls to go further.

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I don’t think it is acceptable behavior for either sex. We hadn’t even pulled out of the school driveway when my phone rang. I haven’t called her mother, but wonder if I still should. Has it really changed in the past couple of decades? If I had teenage daughters would I be seeing it from a completely different perspective?

My 13 year old son had a girlfriend for a few months, let’s call her Glenn. Along the lines of, Then they reached the place of being intrusive. I would want to know if my child was behaving that way.

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