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(Mundy) encourages women on first dates to “own up to your accomplishments, buy him a drink, and tell him what you really do.” Her book is based on recent research that shows that while lower-income women are marrying less often, ladies in the top earning percentile are getting wedded in droves — their marriage rates have increased by ten percentage points.” Amen.

Men really do like smart, strong, successful women.

Especially in a big city like Los Angeles or New York, looks alone do not suffice.

Based on other comments I’ve seen on this site, I know that others have experienced the same thing.

I love it when she can write a sonnet, use Euler's formula, code Perl, play a concerto, speak half a dozen languages, run a company, quote Chaucer, diagnose diabetes, compose a quartet and converse brilliantly.

However, it’s not just the men that have to adapt to the new world order. If you’re a high-earning woman and you out-earn most men, there are two primary reasons you may struggle with relationships: 1) Men don’t necessarily want to date the female version of themselves.

The fact that you’re successful, busy, high-powered, etc., isn’t what’s most important to him in a relationship.

Once you embrace this vision of equality – and start valuing men for things other than their ability to provide for you (when you can already ably provide for yourself), perhaps there’ll be more successful relationships between higher-earning women and lower-earning men. But I’ve consistently fallen in love with significantly less money and it’s always been a problem.


So “owning up to your accomplishments and buying him a drink” is probably not the best strategy for such successful men. 2) You may not have any respect for men who make less than you. Because if there’s one thing that men figured out long ago, it’s that if you’re a successful man, you don’t need to marry a woman for her money. So, if we’re going to embrace the notion of women being equal to (or greater than) men, you can’t just say it’s all on men to suck it up and not feel emasculated because you’re successful.You can marry her for love, kindness, support, laughter, attraction, values, children, respect. It’s your job to stop looking down on men who have lower-paying careers.And before you tell me that this is okay because women have traditionally done this to men, let me state that I don’t think it’s acceptable for a woman to behave in this way, either.So, I’m all down for falling in love with someone who has less money, but the question then becomes how to make that relationship work long-term.

Women hold more managerial and professional jobs, they earn more college degrees, and long-term economic shifts favor fields dominated by women. In “the pervasive notion that men are afraid of high-powered women is kind of bullshit, and that research shows “men will be just as adaptive and realize what an advantage a high-earning partner can be” in the near future.

working wives now out-earn their husbands, and many believe they’ll soon make up a majority.


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