If you are a single woman over 40, you have a love history.You’ve been in relationships before and you may want one now, but for whatever reason you haven’t found the right person yet.Clients come to me with these limiting ideas about dating, love and men, and it’s my job to help them turn things around. That emotional bond and level of maturity is priceless. Dating someone younger may be fun for the short term, but without an emotional bond, it won’t last long. They’ve traveled, they’ve had a career, they’ve had children, and they’ve probably experienced tragedy. In other words, it’s not always about the best body or a wrinkle-free face. We’ve had similar life experiences because we grew up in the same era. There has to be chemistry, but I can much more attracted to someone who is older if the emotional chemistry is there.
In my “Love Essentially” column that appears today in Chicago Tribune Media Group publications, I interviewed 5 men over the age of 40, asking them about dating over 40, and what aged women they prefer. In particular, she’ll tell you that there are so few good guys available over the age of 40, and that even if you weed out the losers and the ones with heavy baggage, the normal, nice ones don’t want HER, they want a woman in her 20s or 30s. I reached out to five different men between the ages of 42 and 55, and combined, they gave me 15 reasons they prefer to be with a women who is around their same age: 1). It’s OK if you are getting gray or getting a spare tire, or prefer a quiet night at home over a loud club. My kids are older and I have a lot more time and more freedom. So, next time you are feeling hopeless, thinking that Mr.
15 Reasons Single Men Prefer Dating Women Over 40 by Jackie Pilossoph Ask any single woman over 40 if it’s hard to meet a man and you’re sure to get an earful. Many men prefer sophisticated, smart, sexy older women to younger women who haven’t really lived yet, and I have proof! I chose to keep all of these men anonymous, but I want to share that 2 of the 5 guys are currently in a serious relationship, both with women over 40.
Still, people fall in love every day and many of my clients do find that loving man. This might seem harsh, but you are likely telling yourself several lies about love after 40 that are hurting you.
These negative beliefs prevent you from connecting, or worse, stop you from even looking.
Women over 40 know who they are and are generally comfortable in their own skin. What women in their 40s have over their younger counterparts is that they are perfectly – miraculously – well calibrated to men their own age. There are no awkward pauses trying desperately to think of something to say. If I’m with a young woman and I mention something about Pink Floyd or REO Speedwagon, chances are she won’t have a clue what I’m talking about. So if I’m dating an older woman, her kids are most likely older and like me, she has time and freedom. The next morning (if there is one) is not about someone taking “the walk of shame” or rushing to get out. Often when you date a younger woman you feel like she is kissing you with one eye open and looking for other, better opportunities. They share maturity, life experience and even pop culture references, they often have similar-aged kids, parents and even gym habits, and most importantly, similar life goals and horizons. You can go to breakfast, maybe do a crossword puzzle together or laugh about the night before. For the most part, women over 40 are looking for true love and will give you undivided attention. Going out with your friends is not awkward because they are her age, as well. What do you talk about with someone who is 25 years younger?