But if you are invited over to someone’s place to hang out and don’t leave or do anything, that’s a non-date. It could turn into a date if both people want it to turn into a date, but it’s not presumed.
I once found myself on a date that turned into a non-date the minute he told me all of his friends were meeting us at the concert. If the plan for your date was to go over to one of your places and cook dinner and watch a movie, fine. If colleague/co-worker/friend asks you to get together to talk business, that’s a non-date. You should not assume that there is any romantic future awaiting you on your non-date.
One point that the piece makes that I agree with is that lots of daters out there — men and women both — are unclear about the difference between a date and a non-date. Unless it’s a polyamorous type of situation, or you agreed upon it in advance, there should only be two people on the date. Just you and him or you and her being alone together doing something at an agreed upon time. What You Can Expect Of A Date: Well, not much really, I’m sad to say. But I think it’s safe to expect that when going on a date both of you are there to see whether or not a romantic connection exists between you. when he texted her and said: “Hey, I’m at Pub & Kitchen, want to meet up for a drink or whatever? I’m here with a bunch of friends from college.”25-year-old Lindsay recalled a “non-date” where after an evening when she exchanged flirtatious glances with a bouncer at a Williamsburg nightclub, the bouncer invited her and her friends back to his apartment for whiskey and boxed macaroni and cheese.29-year-old Cheryl Yeoh “said that she has been on many formal dates of late — plays, fancy restaurants. For her, the old traditions are alive simply because she refuses to put up with anything less.