I am so, so sorry if you’re walking through this, and I want to give a few general thoughts about it.
These would apply whether you catch your husband texting another woman, catch him using porn, or even catch him in an affair.
When a spouse is doing something wrong, one of the marks of it is that they will deflect the blame. If your marriage falls apart, God will not leave you, and He will carry you through this. You will be so scared of losing your marriage that it will be hard for you to confront, to draw boundaries, and to do what is necessary to give yourself a chance at saving your marriage.
I have been praying about this since, but my question is: do I tell him I know?
I am having a very hard time with this, as I feel every time he brings up sex or talks to me about something personal, that he is lying to my face.
Well, the FB text was horrible, sexy talk from him.
He was asking her about masturbation and if she thought about him during it, etc.
Sometimes the questions I get are really hard ones, and today’s is an example.
You’ll likely relate to this: My husband does have a history of looking at porn on the internet, but claims to not do this anymore.
Recently, I logged into his computer to print something, and his facebook was up.
There happened to be a text between he and a “friend” who he claims helped him when we were going through marriage problems a while ago.
He says they were just friends and she helped him understand a women’s point of view.
I see this in so many women’s emails: the husband is doing something that is completely and utterly wrong, and yet she is the one who feels badly or guilty.Here she’s wondering if she should tell him, because if she does he turns it around and often blames her, and this sends her into a tailspin. But listen: I am not saying that your marriage is over. But until you are able to say, “My trust is in God, not in my marriage”, you will not be able to deal with this problem effectively.