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While I've dated other races, I'm mostly attracted to black men.

My eyes and heart tend to steer me in that direction.

Thirteen years of dating boys outside my race and it took sitting down to write this essay to have the first, real conversation with my parents about interracial dating.

I used to say I didn't have a type, but if we go off consistency, I do.

ran on Gawker earlier this month we received hundreds of comments and emails objecting to, agreeing with, or otherwise responding to Baker.

This week, we're publishing some of those responses as part of a conversation about race and relationships.

What I'm attracted to can be found in men of all races: strong arms (sense of protection), a great smile, nice build (healthy), ambitious, passionate, a sense of humor—a touch of sarcasm helps—and a kind heart. My brothers never seemed to have an opinion as to the type of men I dated, and were only concerned with how each guy treated me. My dad has always been a quiet man, and his only insertion in conversations about my dating life: "Are you happy, ?

My mom knew her father wouldn't approve either way. She knew if she wanted to be with my dad, she'd have to runaway with him. Despite not knowing she was pregnant with my older brother at the time, she hid in a bunk in the back of my father's van and they crossed the border together.

They settled in a largely Mexican neighborhood in San Jose, California.

Then, when I was five-years old, they moved to Tracy, about an hour drive east of San Jose, where the population was, and remains, predominantly white.

"You're going to end up pregnant before you're married," she once said. But my grandfather—my mother's father—wasn't too fond of my dad.My dad knew that in order to ask for my mom's hand in marriage, he had to have a house ready for her. He also knew that the American Dream was the dream he wanted to achieve for them. She's always said that he's 'mi media naranja' (a Spanish saying for soul mate).

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39 Comments

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  2. eric   •  

    We are a "no borders" type of site, and welcome all races, religions and sexual orientations.

  3. eric   •  

    In 2009 and again in 2010, he was nominated for a LEO Award for the episodes Summer's End and The Starting Gate.

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