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"A handful of conversations make the biggest difference in the strength and duration of a relationship," says Grenny.
"Talking about sexual intimacy tops that small list." Read on for eight issues to broach and how to approach them so you can move on to more interesting things.1. Unless you want to end up in a "50 Shades of OMG what are you doing? "While it's possible to have a good experience trying something new with no communication, it's also possible to have a someone pulls out handcuffs.
"Americans have intercourse an average of a bit more than once a week," says Dr. If one of you is a morning sex person and the other an evening sex person, "calendar a compromise: a weekend afternoon delight or an after-work assignation," says Dr.
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"You could say, 'If I'm feeling pressured it works against me, but know that I'm OK. If not, drop the issue knowing you've at least mentioned it in a sensitive, supportive manner.4. "It doesn't matter how many sex partners each of you has had," points out Dr. "HPV and other bugs hitch a ride on human genitals, just as the common cold goes for your nose and throat." It's best to talk about this matter-of-factly before you have sex for the first time. "Many women prefer to assume exclusivity because they're afraid the guy won't agree to it." In that case, you should know and make an informed decision about whether to have sex. "You should both feel comfortable, perhaps in one of your homes or in a dimly lit lounge," says Puhn. It's better to talk about not wanting sex, but how do you say "no" without it sounding like "never"?Try: "This is what I do for birth control" and "These are my standards for safe sex." "It's your body, and some conditions are forever—including unplanned offspring," adds Dr. "Just don't talk about it when either of you has had more than one drink."6. "Touch your mate, smile and suggest another time," says Puhn.