The minute he opens his mouth, the reason will be clear.#2: Make it clear to the other person--and yourself--up front that what you're having is a tryst. Don't go out for dinner with the person, or for drinks.Do away with all the trappings of a romantic relationship.What you're doing is not related to "happily ever after." (It may not even last a full three months.) It's simply about sex, purely a physical release, and there's no real future in it.#4: Try to make it as hot and wild--even kinky--as possible. Absolutely Kay, I think you make a good point about when settling is really settling--and Raye, I dig your line about leading with your instincts and (positive) emotions, not insecurities. Lovelies: Over the weekend, I spent some time with my dear friend Jack, a frequent contributor to Nerve.com, where he writes the column "I Did It for Science." Jack is absolutely frighteningly brilliant--or at least, I'm always half-terrified, when I'm with him, that I won't be able to keep up: He has a B. Maybe he's a crazy conservative and you're a wacky liberal, or vice versa. As if all that weren't fantastic enough, he is a huge sweetheart: in addition to being attentive and sweet when we're hanging out, he also goes out of his way to help me in any way he can. Maybe he's the hot idiot guy who works in the marketing department, who always seems to want to get into some inane conversation with you over the water cooler.
You are not special to the person who are shagging, and he is not special to you. The two of you do not have some huge personal connection.