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" except for aging pageant queens and John Mellencamp. I know this because I once worked with a 42-year-old man who was skipping his daughter’s birthday because "she’ll have one every year, but you never know when they’re going to shut down Burning Man for good." True, another factor is judgment from other people, who may see a 44-year-old going to dinner with a 25-year-old and make judgments about which one of them is drowning in student loan debt.

If only I could tell them how many broke, destitute middle-aged guys I’ve slept with, and challenge their ugly stereotypes.

This kind of culling is even easier now that dating sites let us whittle our options down to the year.

I contend that as long as nobody is being willfully creepy (I see you, guys in Ferrari hats), this kind of limitation is mega lame.

And on the other hand, unless you’re going out with somebody she’s young, I don’t think it’s cause for judgment.


From a sexual attraction standpoint, I challenge you to stand me shirtless next to Sophia Loren in Look, Steely Dan probably couldn’t talk at all to "Hey Nineteen" because they admittedly had "nothing in common." Not because she was too young to name an Aretha Franklin song (which, like, come ON, Steely Dan); the idea that people are what pop culture references they know reduces falling in love to trading trivia. A lot of women have told me they won’t date younger men because of maturity issues, and that’s probably where the idea of a prohibitive "age gap" comes into play for a lot of people.As anybody who’s ever had to play "What are your top five favorite movies? A fantastic woman several years my senior recently told me I should only date older men, because even though I’m 28, "being in your twenties is a form of functional retardation." I think there’s a grain of truth there, if only because I don’t know anybody who looks back and thinks, "Man, how awesome was I in my twenties?It’s too bad O-Town was hit by a bus." He was the only "younger guy" I’d ever gone out with, by about six years, and I used to ask my friends obsessively if it was "weird." But they just thought it was strange that all of our conversations could start a potential death rumor about Ray Liotta. Ultimately, it wasn’t that this guy was young; it was that I had absolutely nothing to say to him that wasn’t "There," "Not there," "NOT there, this isn’t anybody’s birthday," or "Slow down, Usain Bolt, who incidentally is A lot of us have found ourselves attracted to somebody younger or older, and have been reluctant to act on it because of some perceived weirdness or taboo.Some of us limit our potential partners to a very specific age range because that’s what we think we’ll be attracted to.


I know many smoking-hot middle-aged people who are emotional teenagers.

I know many brilliant, mature people who aren’t old enough to rent a car.


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